What's Done is Done

So I guess what has had me so preoccupied is now over. Now I think a new phase has just started. I have learned so much about human nature this past few days. I would really like to think people are basically good but sometimes you really have to wonder. Yesterday I was really mad. This morning I went to the garages and took it out there. I wish I could be that angry before a race. This entry may be stream of consciousness and for that I am sorry. I just have so many questions rattling around in my tired brain. This last month I have been given an opportunity that is good for me professionally but has really disturbed me for many reasons. I have gotten to see some inside workings and I realized I am really naive and pretty much foolish. I have to remain vague in this area just to make myself feel better about posting this. Really this post is so I can empty out these thoughts and maybe gain some clarity. I was so angry I was near tears which I haven't been for years. What is it about a group that makes everyone cave under peer pressure? Behind closed doors everyone can agree but as soon as you have to stand behind what you think is right some (or most) cave like dominoes. I saw this yesterday but I was the only one standing by myself feeling foolish for believing what I was told. My eyes are opened now and I can't go back I just wish what I saw was not so completely disappointing. I guess these things happen to harden you against the world. Unfortunately this experience has also made me on the paranoid side and I think most people have a hidden agenda so this post may not be up for long. I don't think anyone who would know what I am talking about would read this but you never know. Until yesterday I thought I had a pretty good idea about people...